Italian Sausage Trottole in Cream Sauce

Today's entry is brought to you by adult beverages. Also with special guest Groll.

This pasta is pretty easy, which is lucky for me because I happened to be attempting to reenact scenes from My Drunk Kitchen instead of paying attention to just how everything was made.

Start out by gathering all your stuff. You will need Italian sausage, red onion, green onion, butter, flour, salt, Parmesan, Havarti, half and half, capers, and pasta. Make garlic bread too! We basically cooked a white sauce and boiled pasta today. I could do this.

Start out by grating some Havarti and chopping the green onions. If you're me, consume a minimum of one adult beverage (with lime).

Put the sausage in a pan and cook it. Nate dubbed this recipe "Angry Meat Tubes in a Very Special Creamy Sauce". There was more to it, but it got very NSFW. Cook the meat, boil some water for pasta, add onions. Still with me?

If you've ever made a white sauce (also known as a roux), you've got this next part. Melt some butter, add enough flour to thicken things up. I'm not sure on quantities here, as Nate doesn't really cook with much measuring, but going off of the picture that looks like a fourth of a cup of flour and about three tablespoons of butter. 

Add half and half, a little at a time. Just remember the more you add, the thinner the sauce will be. Sauce still too thick? You can add a little more. Don't worry. Be happy. Pasta should be cooking at this point.

While you're cooking the pasta, add Havarti to the sauce. My wild guess is about two cups or so. Cook some garlic bread. We went the easy route and got the ready-to-bake stuff. It's still delicious. Is your pasta looking good? Drain it, dump the sauce in, give it a good stir. You're practically done.

Groll played Kitchen Minion and Garlic Bread Hand Model today, and I played Hungry Person with Camera.

Add a few capers to the sauce. You won't regret it. Sprinkle plenty of green onion in there. Mmm.

Garnish with more green onion and a sprinkle of shaved Parmesan. You'll want thirds. 

This cream sauce is not for the faint of heart, or those who have issues with dairy products. I happen to be lactose intolerant, but I'm in possession of magic enzyme pills that help me cheat and eat it anyway.

This tasted Legend- wait for it, and I hope you're not lactose intolerant because the second part of that word is -DAIRY! This guy showed up just to say that.